beautifully haunting memories...

This world was never meant for anyone as beautiful as the both of you.... god i miss them.... my own little girls....

The fickel summer wind...

'The summer wind, came blowin in - from across the sea
It lingered there, so warm and fair - to walk with me
All summer long, we sang a song - and strolled on golden sand
Two sweethearts, and the summer wind

Like painted kites, those days and nights - went flyin by
The world was new, beneath a blue - umbrella sky
Then softer than, a piper man - one day it called to you
And I lost you, to the summer wind

The autumn wind, and the winter wind - have come and gone
And still the days, those lonely days - go on and on
And guess who sighs his lullabies - through nights that never end
My fickle friend, the summer wind'

if only it were that beautiful.... but.... but.... but....!!

Women are fickle... yes, they are.... really.... the ones around me especially.... and it makes me wonder if its just them... or us as a species... the men were always like that... so it comes as no surprise... but the women? It makes me almost not want to be one... or does it? scary thought that is... because i love being a woman... but not someone fickel... and what option do i have anyway? Be a man?!?!?!? no way!! god! I guess there is no good in this thought... its like a dog running after its own tail.... and for all the feminist blood in me... this one time i cant deny it... because they these women are a wall of water before me... and even when i can swim they will drown me... and the clarity and purness everyone can see, shows me only the truth... makes it easier to see the reality... so when they return to the idiot that i am... i already know!!


Wait... if none of that made any sense to you now.... just wait... they'l get you too... not once.... over and over and over again... and no it doesnt matter if your a man or a woman... becasue human beings were made this way, both the sexes... and we are the lowest and most detestable of the worlds creations...

Zombie me....

After no sleep for over 3 days... it feels (though untrue) that i have no mind body coordination at all... you know that experiment game thing they make you do where if you hold one part of your body completely still for a while and you end up feeling like its not there... yeah well... this is sorta like that too... and this rambling state comes with... my eyes cant exactly see what im typing... im hoping the words im saying in my head are the ones my fingers are typing... but u never know right!!

strangely, with all this tiredness the last thing i want to do is sleep.... maybe its how when ur too tired u cant sleep... but its also this feeling that i wanna be outside house... and not sitting still... and though my math exam was a disaster today... IT is the reason iv been awake and am feeling so pooped now.... and its over.....!!! NO MORE MATH!!!! lol... i feel like i should be celebrating.... if only A'bad had a good pub/disco.... booze and dance (and some pretty girls if possible... ahem ahem!!).... aaaaaaahhhh!!!

Of course, all these ideas are what i want to do according to my mind.. if my body had the energy it would kick my minds butt for even thinking of moving................... wow! talk about a weird sentance!!!

Ready, Get Set, Love....

I want to step out of this skin of mine
Leave all the memories behind
Live each day without the knowledge of my past
I want you to do the same
I want you to look at me and fall in love again
Without the care of it consequence
I want to go back to the start